Mom Life: I’m a Stay-At-Home Mom

Mom Life: I’m a Stay-At-Home Mom

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I love being a mom, and I am beyond blessed to have both Madalyn and Gavyn in my life. Some days are TOUGH. And some days my heart is so full I think it may completely burst. I want to open up my blog a little bit and write about what is at the heart of what I do — and that is being a mom. I want to share why I’m a stay-at-home mom, how I recharge as a mom of multiple littles and basically what motherhood means to me. I figured we should start at the beginning…

(Disclaimer: I know that not everyone is blessed with the opportunity to be a stay-at-home mom. This is something that I do not take for granted. I also know that not everyone is cut out to be a stay-at-home mom! And thank goodness for that. I love how God gives everyone different strengths! So, please don’t take this post as meaning that this is the only right way to be a mom. This is just me, sharing what makes me “me”.)

When I get asked by people what I “do” and I respond that I am a stay-at-home-mom, I am still surprised by the many different reactions that I get. I get the sympathetic looks and the “how do you do it?!” looks most often. When we found out that we were pregnant with Madalyn, I fully intended to return to work full-time. When she arrived, I treasured every moment of my maternity leave, knowing that it would come to an end. However, as my twelfth week of leave began, I had this sinking feeling that I just couldn’t go back to work.

Bryan and I had talked about whether or not the option for me to stay home would even be feasible, most importantly financially, and we realized that while we would have to make some changes, it would be possible. But that also brought on a whole host of other questions…

What would I do all day?

Would I miss my professional career?

What would I miss in the “outside” world?

How would we make it all work without my additional income?

This was such a change for me. I was a public accountant and CPA and I spent my days auditing clients. I worked a lot of hours and spent most of my time at work. I enjoyed my job, and it gave me social interaction and a sense of purpose. I worked hard to achieve what I had, and I was scared to be starting over in a completely different role. Especially in the business world, moms leaving to be “a mom” seems to be uncommon!

I made the call to my boss and told her that I couldn’t come back to work full-time and that was one of the scariest moments of my life so far! It was a moment that I had prayerfully considered and rationally analyzed for so long before I made that decision. And talk about trust. There is not a moment of that thought process that didn’t require me to completely trust that God had a plan and that I wasn’t throwing away everything that I had previously worked so hard to accomplish!

I can tell you that the answers to my questions were not all immediate.

What would I do all day?

I change diapers. I feed the kids. I get them dressed…and then dressed again when they spill food everywhere. I buckle them into carseats. I go to the grocery store. I pick up toys…again and again and again. I do endless loads of laundry. I cook. I clean. I vacuum and wash dishes. I clean up messes (yes, I have a boy who is completely into destruction in every way possible). I run errands. I pay bills. (Oh, and P.S. If you aren’t a mom, you will have to remember that these tasks are not done alone…they are always done with one or two kids requiring something at the same time. Folding laundry takes five times as long when you have a 2.5 year old “helping” you.)

But. You know what else I get to do? I get to snuggle my kids before they go down for a nap. I was there when Madalyn started to crawl. I get to kiss their “owies” and hug them when they are upset. I hear them laughing. I get to play with them and teach them. I get to sing “A Part of Your World” over and over and over again each day. I get to give them individual attention and love. I get to be there.

This is what I do all day. Every day. Routine, yes. But my presence in their lives is so worth it.

Would I miss my professional career? What would I miss in the “outside” world?

Yes! I do miss it. I miss it less as time goes on, but that first year was particularly difficult. I would often think to myself “What would I be doing at work right now?” I still miss the people that I worked with and the relationships and friendships that had formed there. I miss the adult interaction and the sense of purpose that easily comes with a paycheck. I don’t physically stay home all day, every day, and that is because I would miss that “outside” world connection. Even a trip to Target makes me feel connected once again. It is hard to leave something that are you so comfortable with to try something completely new and different!

But do I miss my career more than I value staying home? No, definitely not. There will be a time to come when I can go back to being “me” in the professional world, and I will be excited for that. But in the meantime I am where I need to be.

How would we make it all work without my additional income?

God provides! Because of my being home, Bryan is able to focus more on work than he probably would have if we had both been 50/50 responsible for the kids. I don’t have to pay anyone for child care. I am able to spend more time finding sales and deals and the best places to buy things in order to save more of our money. This is really a loaded question for me (oh, and did I mention that Bryan is a financial planner?), and there are lots of ways that I could answer this question and am still answering it a couple years after I quit my full-time job. For now, I will tell you that you can always be confident in the fact that God does provide! If you are prayerful about your decisions and you make that effort to save how you can, it can work!

The greatest blessing in my life besides being married to my sweet, and hard-working handsome husband, are my two children. They seriously make my life worth it. I may not get a paycheck at the end of the week or a quarterly stellar performance review to boost my confidence, but I am able to see my kids grow and thrive and smiling. There is absolutely nothing else like being a mom. And I am so thankful that God picked me to be Madalyn and Gavyn’s.

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I hope you are enjoying this week as we get ready for Easter! I am really looking forward to the weekend!

xo,

Abby

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One thought on “Mom Life: I’m a Stay-At-Home Mom

  1. I agree totally and fully. You are such a beautiful and talented mama! Those kids are lucky!!!! And that husband too! Thanks for taking the time to share!

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